Because today at my follow-up appointment, you were clean-shaven - like you read what I said. And you totally seemed to get my jokes about the paper shorts. And you took your time with your wandering wand, like you were daring me to say something about it. Hmmmmm. Well, I'm onto you, mister.
Surely not, right? I mean, RIGHT?! Because that would be extremely embarrassing. Well, considering that he saw the Treasure Map before he ripped it out piece by piece, and also the stretched out polka dot panties, nothing should embarrass me anymore. Still. I hope he doesn't read it.
Ok. You know how women are....no one admits to having any sort of anything Not Great. And then when one of us admits to the Not Great Thing, everyone comes rushing out of the closet, interrupting each other and tripping over themselves with relief that they are not the only one with the Not Great Thing and they can't wait to talk about it and how their cousin has it too and what do you do about it and tell me exactly where yours is and pretty soon we all feel such relief that we are not alone in our Not Great Things that we admit to a small mountain of other Not Great Things.
Such is apparently the case with the veins in our legs. So because you're asking, here's the telling...
1. I got all my procedures done by Dr. Oberhelmen at Kansas Surgical Arts in Wichita. And McHottie (ok, fine, his name is Brandon) is the sonogram technician. I highly recommend that office.
2. My symptoms were heaviness and pain in my legs - especially the left one. It felt very much like growing pains, and would get worse as the day wore on, to the point where I was putting heat on my leg nearly every night when I went to bed. I didn't know how heavy they were until after I had these procedures and now I realize that your legs are not supposed to feel like your veins are full of led. It all started with my first pregnancy and got worse with each one after.
3. Insurance covered all but four office visit copays of $40. To qualify for this, I had to wear the tights for 3 months (which I did when I was pregnant), and measurements - taken by sonogram - had to prove that my veins were insufficient.
3. I had 4 procedures...
- A VNUS Closure done by catheter in both legs - where a catheter is threaded up the vein - from knee to groin and is slowly removed, burning the vein as it goes, closing off the vein and rerouting the blood to the deep vein. They do each leg separately. So that's two procedures. Here's a youtube video of it. Its gross, so unless you're my cousin Lisa, you probably don't want to watch it: VNUS Closure
- A vein closure done by injections in both legs - where chemicals are injected into veins ankle to knee to shut them down.
- Those three things were done on veins that I can't see, but were apparently insufficient and responsible for my symptoms.
- And a phlebectomy, where little incisions were made and an ugly vein was removed from the back of my thigh.
4. There were 11 office visits total....One to determine treatment, 4 procedures, 5 sonograms, and 1 follow-up.
5. I had to wear the tights for 3 weeks after each procedure. Still wearing them from the last one!
I think that's it. I totally recommend doing this!
And ok, fine....because photos make every post better....
Oh my word he is more than worth it!!!!!!!
